30.11.2002  12:15 PM Sitting alone.. Calmed by memories..

Maybe I'm not able 2 express my feelings & thoughts through writings, but something inside of me want 2 share a little part of my life with you. Sometimes I just wanna cry...

When someone dies... You don't get over it by forgetting... You get over it by remembering... & you're aware that no person is ever truly lost or gone... Once they have been in our life & loved us, As we have loved them.

I realize that I'm not the only one who goes through hard times...

AnywayzZz, I'm such a huge admirer of his Forum... mmm, I added something.. if u wanna know what is it.. check it here...

22.11.2002  4:15 PM

True beauty is not high cheekbones, long legs or bulging biceps. You can only find it if you look with an open mind & heart. You don't see it often, & then usually only for a split second, but it's always there, just out of sight... like the one time I saw true beauty in my grandpa's soul...

My earliest memories center around his sense of humor & how he always brightened every one's day.

He has shown us one of the most important aspects of his world... Making others happy by brightening their days with laughter.

I wish you could speak 2 me as u once did. What I do know is that I love you. Something I never knew before.

20.11.2002  7:50 PM

Owaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa... our exams weren't as easy as I thought they would be... I didn't do well... DG, u didn't call!! *e7im*

....

Remembering......

I still remember that terrible day...I was in AD... (@ hotel nade el '6ba6) On my laptop "surfing some websites".. I discovered their lies with clues. & suddenly... I saw my heart being torn away from my body & being thrown down on the floor. I don't know!! How could they? After everything we'd been through together, none of that seemed to matter to them now. The phrases I love yous, the deep stares & the longing I had surely seen in their eyes. (It was over)... I felt my eyes got fiery, & I watched as my vision returned 2 that familiar blur. The tears came &, @ first, I let them. The silent streams running down my cheeks quickly turned into pitiful sobs as I struggled to gain control of myself & began to choke back my sorrow. My mind raced back 2 everything we'd said and done. Now everything seemed unreal. My heart ached @ the thought of them. They were my first, & @ the time it felt like they would be my last. All of the nights I had been kept awake by provoking thoughts of them, & all the days when the world seemed harsh & frigid, until their eyes met mine. All of that was over now as I sat on my floor sobbing away my dreams.

I don't regret... and I'm forgetting you...

Remember what's most important (friendship) & what will last the longest (friendship).

13.11.2002  3:55 PM

I hope you haven't been waiting so long... I'm here to say Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii Plus.. I'm rueful... I can't confront my fears... An ice-cold chill is rushing through my body... I'm trying to sustain my hopes... I've been so grouchy today and my room is in terrible disarray... I'm not planning on going to somewhere....  And I'm starving to death... so I'd better leave this precious place because I have to recite some verses before watching (Holako) series... bye bye...

10.11.2002  11:15 AM

Talking to myself:

Now I understand why parents and grandparents say they'll like whatever you give them as long as it's something from you. Because when you receive a gift from someone you really love, it will be so special no matter what it is. And really... Loving someone was a new feeling for me.. Owaa Owaaa ehi ehi ehi I wanted to give someone a huge hug and never let it go... I was afraid I would cry... loool... as dumb as it sounds, it's absolutely true...

Talking to my grandfather:

I miss u so much...  I never thought I'd miss u this way... I know that If u were here u would encourage me to achieve my aim... I'm lost in this horrible world without u... In every dream you hugged me and you smiled softly and said to me: " I forgave you "... You were the source of (comfort) in this family...Everything has changed in this family since the day u left us I hadn't got the chance to tell you @ least the word (goodbye)... I was so stupid... I didn't care...

Talking to someone careless:

Hey someone!! see how I feel guilty!! you can see how I regret!!! you can see how it's painful.. you can see how it really hurts... One day you'll open your eyes... and the world will close in... and you'll regret.. and you'll feel guilty.. And I'll be gone...    

Talking to u (Visitors & pals):

Hey I'm here today just to tell u that Mimi has a wonderful layout! check it... it's co_ol... And check my new work here... wo bass

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