I'm sleepy now..
I've been crying for too
long... Sometimes, trust leads to heartbreak & doubts always rule my
thoughts.... & I just don't know how to react in an appropriate
way! aaaaah... I'll never be able to get the time back or to say
that I'm sorry... Forgiveness is tough, but life is too short to
hold grudges. It seems so much easier to be angry at a person or
to keep feelings inside & continue on as if nothing has
happened. Yes I caaaaan't hate... I don't want anything now... I
just wanna be alone without having selfish ppl around...
Oh I miss
you...
Grandpa... Every childhood memory
is colored with his presence... without him I wouldn't know how
to forgive & how to be patient... I once wrote him a letter
(after his death)... I shared everything with my grandfather in
that letter, things I wished I would have said years ago.... I
believe my grandpa heard my words, & that has helped me to get
on with my life. Shall I say more or shall I stop?
(Me) In real
life...
If you sit with me, you'll never
feel the hurt I hide inside... No.. I'm too different in real
life ... I always burst out
laughing (laughable)... I always drive ppl crazy... I'm
talkative, curious & noisy... but (miserable inside)... I write
here just to help myself to ease my pain away... writing
sometimes helps me to avoid being isolated... Because when I
write my journal, some of u read... others add their comments...
Then I become so happy @ the end... Some ppl can express their
feelings through drawing or writing... others can just remain
silent without thinking of a way to let the whole huge mountain
out from their chest so they can breathe... & that really
hurts... AS for me.. well I guess I failed in expressing my
feelings in almost all the ways...
But I'm sure that
friends understand each other's thoughts even before
they're spoken.
nice shot?
I went with dad, uncle & fa66ami
to Nodo's restaurant to have our dinner there... It wasn't too bad...
So Uncle suggested to travel
abroad with him to Spain while dad asked me to go
with him to Frankfort...
I don't know!!! I wanna
stay here..
Oh yes I had my breakfast with my
aunt in wafi...
yummy.... I really had fun with
her...
.......
el '7or...
Sbaaloh..
@ last... I don't think of someone
used to be my sweetheart very often these days....
then why that someone lives in
my dreams??? I don't wanna see you even in dreams!
what a selfish person!!!! You think I'm gonna sacrifice for you?
You think I'm gonna long to see you? you think you're happy?
yeah yeah happy!! well I
offered my help sO many times.. I gave you what you were looking
for... but you're greedy!! what can I say? Selfish ppl are
always like that... I got used to them... they're everywhere...
I've been crying for too
long... Sometimes, trust leads to heartbreak & doubts always rule my
thoughts.... & I just don't know how to react in an appropriate
way! aaaaah... I'll never be able to get the time back or to say
that I'm sorry... Forgiveness is tough, but life is too short to
hold grudges. It seems so much easier to be angry at a person or
to keep feelings inside & continue on as if nothing has
happened. Yes I caaaaan't hate... I don't want anything now... I
just wanna be alone without having selfish ppl around...
... I always burst out
laughing (laughable)... I always drive ppl crazy... I'm
talkative, curious & noisy... but (miserable inside)... I write
here just to help myself to ease my pain away... writing
sometimes helps me to avoid being isolated... Because when I
write my journal, some of u read... others add their comments...
Then I become so happy @ the end... Some ppl can express their
feelings through drawing or writing... others can just remain
silent without thinking of a way to let the whole huge mountain
out from their chest so they can breathe... & that really
hurts... AS for me.. well I guess I failed in expressing my
feelings in almost all the ways...
But I'm sure that
friends understand each other's thoughts even before
they're spoken.
I don't know!!! I wanna
stay here.. 
then why that someone lives in
my dreams??? I don't wanna see you even in dreams!
what a selfish person!!!! You think I'm gonna sacrifice for you?
You think I'm gonna long to see you? you think you're happy?
yeah yeah happy!! well I
offered my help sO many times.. I gave you what you were looking
for... but you're greedy!! what can I say? Selfish ppl are
always like that... I got used to them... they're everywhere...
