Have you ever felt that you cannot feel
anything?? That you're suddenly
immobilizing from fear??? I slipped
away my only goal easily just because I couldn't feel anything!! I was
afraid of being changed! my goal was so near that I could almost touch
it, but I just gave it up... the weirdest thing was that I didn't
regret!
I'm still feeling numb... Maybe God
wanted me to busy myself thinking of some ppl to forget about my
plans... maybe my plans aren't suitable for me!
I feel
drowsy most of the time & I have no clue about how to help myself! I
don't even visit my relatives!! I cannot be happy when I'm surrounded
by them!!!! & this is something so strange about MIRACLE!!!
when you send someone a gift, an email
or even SMS.. don't you expect a reply from that person??? lol! it
seems so funny! at least compliment me & say thanks! lol... anyways,
it seems that you'll never learn from your mistakes & you enjoy being
YOU! So I was a free chance offered for you.. & you didn't accept your
final chance.. It's up to yoooooou.
Thx dxb girl for the lovely stuff
><
I liked Grave of the fireflies... I kept
crying at the end of the film for about 20 minutes :p
This BOOK IS MORE THAN AMAZING!!! It's
A-MUST for mn~Dubai, el3noood & Unknown! It's a story
about 4 characters searching for cheese in a maze!! 2 are mice..
(sniff & scurry) & the other 2 are little people (hem & haw)... the 4
characters in this imaginary story are intended to represent the
Simple & the complex parts of ourselves, regardless of our age,
gender, race or nationality. This BOOK is so helpful!
Sniff <= who sniffs out change early...
Scurry <= who scurries into action...
Hem <= Who denies & resists change as he
fears it will lead to something worse... Unfortunately, I'm more
like Hem
Haw <= who learns to adapt in time when
he sees changing can lead to something better.
& here are some quotes which were taken
from the book:
"What would you
do if you weren't afraid?? when you are afraid things are
going to get worse. If you don't do something, it can prompt you into
action. But it's not good when you're so afraid that it keeps you from
doing anything." <= As if he was telling ME these things!!
"Movement in a new direction helps you
find new cheese" cheese stands for whatever's important to you like
getting into college or getting married.. whatever!! so that quote
above relieved me... So I can move in a new direction and never try to
turn back to look for my old cheese!!!
"The quicker you let go of old cheese,
the sooner you find new cheese"
"Fears making things worse "
"When you stop being afraid you feel
good"
"Once he has gotten past his fear, it
turned out to be more enjoyable than he once believed it could be"
"He realized the fastest way to change
is to laugh at your own FOLLY then you can let go & quickly move on"
:p
So I shall say it for all those who fear
to change:
"DON'T Be such a HEM! Go for it!!"
because you're the ones who will
pay for your faults sooner or later!
I also think of reading the original
story of who moved my cheese by Spencer Johnson... & I moved your
cheese by Darrel Bristow-Bovey...
LOOOOOL "This is the self-help book for
ppl who want to take NO steps at all. This is the self-help book for
ppl lying on the sofa" lool this is a must for dxb girl!!
SO I returned back to my
room.. @ first it was so tidy & clean... come & see how messy it is
NOW!!
Pics of my rooom:
On my desk
Messy
As if I have my own kitchen!!
B-flee's M&M & Chocolates
!!!
Some tweetish stuff were found in my
room while trying to clean it up.. :D Oh yeah I'm trying my best to
avoid the disarray!
This pencil case was from my cousin.. I
tried my best to preserve it & it looks so new! I wonder if YOU still
remember it!
I also found my FLUBBER keychain
I don't have enough time to re-arrange
my rooooooooom
Coffee, tea or me? I'm crazy about
CUPS.. especially if I see a heart printed on it!!
Pinkish lights ;)
I almost forgot about this cam!!
....................
Oh yes I went to EL magrudy book shop &
Spinneys today
Buy organic food ONLY (it's a
handmade jam)
Last whisper:
The past is gone & will never be...
The future only God knows about...
So life for me is this right moment,
The moment I lay my eyes on you....
((Pals.. I'm not gonna update this page
for quite a while...))...
19|8|2004 7:05 PMThe last update...
Hey pals.. this is gonna be the last
update before I leave Germany...
Missing those whom you really Love
drives you crazy ((not sometimes.. most of the time))... some of the
ppl can conceal it & remain silent while they're fighting back their
feelings & emotions harshly... others cannot control their actions &
start to shed tears like children... You're the solution to those who
really miss you... You've to pick up the phone.. dial their numbers..
and start sharing your feeling too...
what would you do if you couldn't
contact them?? what would you do if they wanted you to be so near & u
were so far away from them? what would you do if you didn't want them
to suffer & you knew that each word from you would bring them nothing
but pain? how would you console them & ease their pain away?
دقات قلبي لن تزول حتى
أبشر بالقبول
I felt so lonely while I was sipping my
cappuccino... Some ppl I cherish are dejected & so sad these days... I
don't know how I will ever forgive myself for what I've done... :(
sorry... sorry... sorry... sorry... sorry... sorry... sorry... sorry
I always see your vision in the midst of
crowds..
Cute Philippine baby doll... ((mashallah))
Shopaholic... what a crazy girl I was!!
whenever I felt sad I rushed to shopping... Now I feel so bored... I
wanna return back home to:
~go to spinneys 2 get healthy food &
evian water... *need to sit her life back in order*...
~go to el magrudy book shop to to to
receive the books which I've ordered lately...
~adjust my room... it's in terrible
mess!!
w bass...
19|8|2004 2:35 AM
FEW DAYS ONLY
Hey.. gaze at the pic.. someone is
sleeping over there Zzzz
Hey friends... I'm gonna return back
home soon inshallah... very very soon... Just wait.. *hugs &
kisses*... I cannot maintain my composure any longer... I'm so excited
to return back to Dubai... Poor lolly & mn~dubai.. they're waiting for
something ;)
Want some M&M??
Or some cake?
Beethoven's rass
Choofoo el egggg
خالي يقول: "شووف البيضبأه واتعلم.. بين الحبايب تعرف تتكلم"
حبيب مشتاء ويستناك...
يممممي
there was an error.. ya 7aram!
time to sleeeeeeeep
buh bye
9|8|2004 12:18 AMBass cheeh!!
say es baidea desh om besh Bom.. ya3nee
"cheese" bel almany
يا عجوزا في
الغابرين...
Believe it or not.. This lady asked me
to take a pic of moi.. as if I'm an alien or something strange!! I was
like: "shoooooooooooooh???" lol.. then I made a deal with her... I
asked her to take a pic of her first then she can take a pic of me..
and she absolutely agreed!!
So where's his body?
He feels lonely! :( because we're gonna
return back home sooooon!!
Thanks.. you knew I'd love them ;)
wanna taste? yummm
Love was when I loved you
I wanted this watch, but I got another
one
DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY... NEVER MEANT TO
FEEL THIS WAY... DON'T WANNA BE.. ALONE TONIGHT..
من كثر ما خاف من الحشرات... قرصتني اليوم حشرة غريبة
عجيبة... ريلي اتعورني الحين
waaaaaaaaaaaaaa2...
8|8|2004 9:47 PM
Dear precious..
A lot of things have changed in me just
because of one short email from some ppl... I was touched by each word
they've typed... I was shedding endless tears...
I know them when they lie & when they don't... they were so
truthful... It's as they said... I knew them when they were soft &
gentle... I couldn't accept the idea of them being changed, but how
could I ever imagine that they would turn out to be so cold &
insensitive? was there a warning sign? if so.. I never saw it.. It
must have been hidden by their beautiful brown eyes...
I tried to change them so many times
just to spread happiness among them...
I remember how I used to get them
chocolate whenever I went over their house, but they don't have
something to remind them of me except an ordinary medallion...
I'm wondering... Do they long to hear my
voice as I do? Do they remember my features? do they remember my short
black hair? or the way I used to see myself in their eyes?? do they
remember how I was eager to sit beside them?? I was fighting for them
when I felt that someone would take my place... because they were mine
back then & I wouldn't let anyone take them from me..
My dear most precious one,
you said it yourself... feelings remain
the same even if it has been 5 years since the last time we saw each
other... you've chosen your own path.. no one forced you to do so...
and you can refresh your soul now... try to change... not for me... I
know that I mean nothing to you... I'm just an old memory that faded
long time ago... I wanna be with you again, but I don't wanna get hurt
once more... I'm willing to help you without waiting for anything in
return... just give me the chance & don't be rude... If my last chance
don't work out right, then I'll fade away from your life forever...
they're not only words... they're gonna be ACTIONS soon inshallah...
.......
Hmmm dxb girl & lolly..
forgive me for this.. I guess I'm gonna stay longer here... so what
ya3nee? :P I guess you got used to my absence..
Cute tiny toony girl
Green frog :D I loved it.. wayed soft
Diddle..
ArnOoobtee
الله بيت السنافرررر
I love the "@" sign
:p
wesh tha? 5erb6aition?
I miss my cousin a lot... he went to
Munich while we stayed here... it's too boring to stay here without
him :(
5|8|2004 6:19 PMSo many
feelings...
from where to start?
speechless!!
wanna play!
Happy childhood
;)
Dear cousin.. sorry for not bidding
farewell to you today.. I had coryza & I took Zertic before I went to
bed... it was dizzying me all night long that I couldn't wake up in
the morning to thank you for being so sweet with moi... Thanks for the
pillow.. you know how I'm head-over-heels in love with (heart-shaped)
stuff... you made me feel so happy that day...
years had gone by... & the feelings
remained the same... my actions spoke the truth... my expressions told
them my feelings... I couldn't stop to keep myself from thinking
of them... those memories we shared will keep chasing me... ((funny))
how I used to think of studying abroad just to forget all about
them!!!
1|8|2004 12:31 AM
Adventures...
Hello,
Before few days me & my two cousins went
alone to the backyards of their house...
of course it
was too dark, gloomy & quite dangerous because it was around 12:30 AM!
but we were so excited to discover the world (awannaa)!
Actually we were starving to death so we
decided to have our dinner at the Chinese restaurant.. Unfortunately,
they were closing it by the time we reached..
hmmm, we thought of MacDonald, but it was also closed... and finally
we lost hope & we gave it up..
when we were on our way back to home we
saw a tall worm.. eeeeeew!!! one of my cousin doesn't fear insects...
she was playing with the worm... and then she inserted the stick
inside its tall body.. ewwwwww ewww eww big time!!! ~I'm not gonna add
the shot of the worm.. because it's so yukky..
.........
and just before 3 days me and my cousins
went out from Germany to (Brussels) in Belgium...
Although it was a short trip, we enjoyed
it a lot because it reminded us of our childhood... entering CITY 2
was like entering a place of amusement... it's an old center though...
but as I mentioned there is a special memory lies upon that place...
city 2
I went to "club" and bought some copy
books from 3em 3es 3en..
nice?
fwightened.. Boo!!
/
we had a delicious lunch.. "payOoola" <=
wrong spelling.. adree :p
/
Yummy...:D
/
what a wonderful scene! this pic was
taken while we were returning back to Bonn..
This looks like a painting, right?
.........
yesterday me & my curious cousin decided
to walk & go to MacDonald just for the sake of Apple pies & ice-cweam...
railway station...
we saw this old woman meditating on
somebody's wedding...
I loved this shot ;)
.........
This is the final part of today's
update.. I pwomise..
what would you do if you were in my
situation??? I have this curious cousin who wants to know every tiny
toony thingie.. even if it was something so personal he would die to
know it... every now & then he comes to my room to steal my personal
diary-book... & when I punish him he starts laughing out loudly... he
told me that he would copy the pages of my diary book... :S now I
don't write things that are so personal & secretive... waaaaaaaaa2 I
feel so restricted..
if u wanna check out the old news of
7.2004 click here
& finally.. don't miss nafe3's
website... check
out his profile ;) DON'T MISS IT
That you're suddenly
immobilizing 
from fear??? I slipped
away my only goal easily just because I couldn't feel anything!! I was
afraid of being changed! my goal was so near that I could almost touch
it, but I just gave it up... the weirdest thing was that I didn't
regret!
I feel
drowsy most of the time & I have no clue about how to help myself! I
don't even visit my relatives!! I cannot be happy when I'm surrounded
by them!!!! & this is something so strange about MIRACLE!!!
buh bye
I know them when they lie & when they don't... they were so
truthful... It's as they said... I knew them when they were soft &
gentle... I couldn't accept the idea of them being changed, but how
could I ever imagine that they would turn out to be so cold &
insensitive? was there a warning sign? if so.. I never saw it.. It
must have been hidden by their beautiful brown eyes...
of course it
was too dark, gloomy & quite dangerous because it was around 12:30 AM!
but we were so excited to discover the world (awannaa)!
hmmm, we thought of MacDonald, but it was also closed... and finally
we lost hope & we gave it up..
